Monday, November 29, 2010

Thanksgiving Into Advent: A Funny Sort of Gratitude Post

I hope that you and your's had a blessed Thanksgiving!

We got back late last night from our Thanksgiving travels. And can I be honest? This trip was just hard.

It was hard for all sorts of reasons, some of which I understand and others I don't. There were obvious things that made it challenging, like way too much traffic, my blooming cold and cough (complete with sinus headache) which was aggravated by one house we stayed in being too hot and the other (at least the bedroom we slept in) too cold. The sweet girl was a whirl of emotions, loving time with family, but as the only kid in households of adults, sometimes struggling with all that "adult talk" that gets "soooo boring." And as always, dealing with the emotions of good-byes very hard for her. She had some struggles in the last two days particularly, with several outbursts, and I was on edge, feeling raggedy and sick, and lost my temper and my patience more than once.

Both our parental households (where we split the days we were away) are pretty stressed in different ways right now, with our moms worn out from care for dad and stepdad, both ill. At D's house, his stepfather's confusion, as his Alzheimer's worsens, continues to be a heartbreak for all of us and an especial challenge for his mom. At my house, I think my mom spent most of the time trying to make sure my dad didn't overdo while my sister and I spent most of our time trying to make sure mom didn't overdo. I was not fully prepared to see how tired my mother is. And it was painfully hard (since I'm being so honest here) to be with my sister for a couple of days and yet not really get any time just to be with my sister. Though I loved all the ways she went out of her way to make sure that she and the sweet girl got some special time together in the midst of everything.

So...home late last night to the realization that we had not bought any advent candles and to some tears as we tiredly straggled around our table, worn out from the jammed turnpike and a day where we hadn't always shown one another the grace we should (and I raise my hand first into the air here).

And yet...

So much to be thankful for. Thankful for:

88. ~the grace that met us round the mostly empty (except for a few old candle stubs) advent wreath, even when we didn't come with any of our own

89. ~the grace that always meets us, wherever we are, and sustains us even in difficult times

90. ~safe travels in our old car, despite so much traffic, and relatively few bad delays

91. ~time spent with loved ones, so dear to us

92. ~my Dad still being with us this Thanksgiving (something I would not have been at all sure of in May)

93. ~time just being hugged by my Mom

94. ~a delicious Thanksgiving dinner, prepared by loving hands, and the fun of both helping to prepare it and eat it!

95. ~time to get to know my brother-in-law better

96. ~the opportunity to "meet" (via phone) my niece's fiance -- and to celebrate in their joy as they're planning to wed in January

97. ~laughter with my sister

98. ~walking in the garden with Dad, and smelling the fall-blooming camellias, so lovely and mildly pink in the midst of the autumnal yard

99. ~having autumn back for a few days! (it's winter cold here, and the leaves mostly long gone, but there were still some brilliant colors down south)

100. ~the sweetness of my husband, especially when I was feeling anything but sweet

101. ~a special time at my husband's grandparents' graves, with his dear aunt

102. ~watching the sweet girl hand-in-hand with her aunt and uncle as we walked around the block in the neighborhood where I grew up

103. ~the license plate game -- what would we do without it?! -- and the fun of finding 38 states

104. ~the added fun of coming up with crazy mnemonics as we memorized the thirteen original colonies in order of their statehood

105. ~the colorful construction paper leaves on the "thankful tree" in the dining room, and the sweet girl's leaves (each signed with a flourish in her best cursive signature) especially the one that read simply "Lord, thank you for sending your Son."

106. ~remembering that God isn't through working in me -- and in all of us -- yet.

2 comments:

Erin said...

So nice to see this post from you, Beth. Is it corny to confess I've missed you this week? :)

I'm sorry that your travels were hard in some ways but glad you had moments of warmth and happiness in the midst of it all. The image of you and your dad walking along enjoying the flowers together especially makes me smile.

Nathan stuck around long enough last night for us to light the Advent candle after I got home from work. And he informed us that, when it comes to his favorite Christmas carol, he's inclined to say "O Holy Night" or "Ave Maria," but they are "too cliche," so instead he had to go with "Good King Wenceslas". I think he can pretty much rest assured that he won't have to battle too many other people for that one... It is a great song, though!

Anyway, welcome back!

Beth said...

Erin, not corny at all. I missed you too! With both sets of parents completely computerless now, and with no laptop, I really was without access for almost a week -- and while the "fasting" did me good in many ways, it also made me feel strangely cut off from some dear friends like yourself!

I think travels were especially hard because I was so tired before we left (already!). Also lots of emotions regarding "aging" right now, in both families...

I love all the Christmas carols Nathan mentioned, including Wenceslas! ;-) Happy, happy to be in advent...